Printer for sA.I.l

I have never really used eBay all that much. Over the years I’ve sold a thing here, a thing there. At the end of the process I always felt like I got screwed somehow. For a reason I can’t even remember now, I finally created an account for my startup. Numerous times, when I tell someone what it is, the first question is “oh, are you selling on eBay”? No, I opted for the far easier route of building my own website of course! But ultimately I figured managing an eBay account was nearly the same amount of work as managing a website. Pros and cons I guess, but I digress.

As fate would have it, a few weeks later I would receive a donation. A very large, very valuable donation. This printer. An HP Designjet t1700. I was at a house party hosted by a fellow dad from my daughter’s soccer team. After chatting with him for a bit the question “what do you do” came up. When he heard “3D printing” he immediately exclaimed “I need to give you a printer”! Slightly baffled I asked a few questions. AH, a 2D printer. Not exactly my wheelhouse, but he needed it gone, and didn’t have time to hunt anyone down; I was in the right place at the right time.

Suddenly, setting up that eBay account seemed like a really smart move. So weird how that happens sometimes, and it was amazing timing. E30 Update does have some bills coming up, like, for that aforementioned website. We’re also wrapping up development on some major new products and it would be nice to invest some of those dollars in materials for R&D and maybe a new (3D) printer. So off to eBay!

AI is clearly infiltrating every platform on earth. So I wasn’t shocked at all that eBay has started implementing this “cutting edge tech” into it’s listing process. I was already beginning to think about how dry and canned my listing was going to sound – what with 600 other virtually identical listings, any one of which can conveniently be used as a template for one’s own listing. I don’t know a lot about this type of equipment so it would be a little difficult for me to creatively expound on why someone should buy this particular plotter.

And then there is was. A handy button reading “Use AI description”. Above it, an extra pop-up bubble emphasizing the new feature: “New! Let AI draft it for you Save time by using AI to draft an item description. You can review it for accuracy and make any edits”.

As a bit of a tongue-in-cheek half-joke, I started declaring that “*NO AI WAS USED IN THE CREATION OF THIS CONTENT*” at the bottom of my YouTube video descriptions. But naturally I had to see what this (InCrEdIbLe!) tech would crank out, half-expecting it to be a paywalled feature. The irony is that the AI generated description was even dryer, and even more canned sounding than If I had made my best attempt at sounding as dry and canned as I could.

I get it, there are platforms out there that allow the user to direct the AI to be more creative. The more input you give it the more tailored to your specific desires yadda yadda. But it got me thinking; AI doesn’t really know you. It can’t really know the intimate ins-and-outs of your life. It doesn’t know if you went to a party last week unless you tell it. It doesn’t know that you got a valuable gift.. unless you tell it. Sure as we allow these technologies deeper and deeper access into our lives, it may someday be able to write a clever creative eBay description for selling a high-dollar piece of equipment you got from a well-meaning acquaintance.

So if I have to feed the AI all this information, give it an objective, proofread, rinse, repeat, edit, proofread…

I’m sorry – what am I missing? Am I old-fashioned? Bonafide luddite? Plain crazy? Madman?

There’s just something about AI that gives me regression vibes. Much like the offshoring of our industrial sector, or the relinquishing control of our currency to a cartel of banks, or using iPads as babysitters; handing off our creative and intellectual workloads to an internet-connected algorithm seems similar, only with the potential of far worse, and more-difficult-to-reverse consequences.

Paranoid?

Sure I have no white papers to reference here. Only some thoughts I had while listing a printer on eBay. But anyway, here’s what the AI came up with:

“This HP DesignJet T1700dr 44″ Wide Format Printer Plotter is the perfect addition to any printing and graphic arts business or industrial setting. With its inkjet technology and wide format capabilities, it can produce high-quality plots and prints with ease. The plotter is designed to be reliable and efficient, making it ideal for large print runs. Its brand, HP, is known for producing top-of-the-line printing equipment, and this model is no exception. The Designjet T1700DR is a plotter that is made in China and is perfect for those in the printing and graphic arts industry.”

Wow! Talk about a sales pitch!

I’ve weighed the pros and cons of taking this thing out of the box, setting it up, and using it to make some money. Spoiler alert: The cons far outweigh the pros. So I’m going to sell it. While E30 Update is enjoying it’s best year yet, we are a (very) small, young “friends & family” funded startup, and every dollar matters. So I’m going to open up bidding on this beauty. I’m hoping everyone gets a fair deal for this large-format plotter… but if some generous bidder wants to also be a contributor to a small, innovative, independent startup with really big ideas and plans by bidding a bit over the average market rate, well, I won’t cancel the auction.

Now that I have an eBay account, I’ll probably start useing it to put random stuff like this up for *sale*. I already have a couple other items up too, so I’d love if you also checked them out. The more you click, the more the algos love me! And now when people ask me if I’m selling on eBay I can say “Yeah!… sorta”.

If you do happen to have the winning bid, and are also (however unlikely) a vintage BMW collector, we’d love to offer you 50% off your first order on e30update.com! Don’t need this thing? Yeah I get that, neither do I! But if you happen to know “those in the printing and graphic arts industry” and you think they might be in the market for this “top-of-the-line printing equipment”, please share this with them. I can tell you that this “Wide Format Printer Plotter is the perfect addition to any printing and graphic arts business or industrial setting“!

One thing is for sure: it took a lot longer to write this myself than it would have taken AI. But could it have written a nuanced paragraph detailing my underwhelming experiences using eBay? Could it have known how I randomly came into possession of this behemoth of an image replicator? What about incorporating a thoughtful questioning of the use of AI itself for writing marketing copy from a human perspective from having encountered an AI copywriting feature while listing the item? Or what about shamelessly asking strangers on the internet to pay more than they might normally have for a machine I got for free because they like what my startup does? I guess we’ll never know! What I do know is that I don’t see myself using AI in the creation of content in the foreseeable future. I also don’t see myself using this printer, and selling it will help E30 Update make a lot more original content. So if you’re in Atlanta, Birmingham, Chattanooga, Huntsville, Knoxville, Nashville or other surrounding areas and you need one of these things, save money and come pick it up!

GLWYB!

*AI helped in the creation of this content, just not in the way it thought it would.

** I found the memes on the interwebs. If you want credit, prove it’s yours.

Don’t Stance UR e30! (Do This Instead)!

It’s time to mow the grass, have you stanced your mower?

Don’t Stance UR e30!

(Do This Instead)!

Anyone who knows me knows I’m not a stance guy – when it comes to my cars. But my mowers? That’s a different story! We don’t have any parts related to slamming your E30, but we do have a bunch of parts that can make your replica of God’s Chariot look great in other ways!

E30s in Turkey?

Growing fan base in Turkey?! 🤨🤗🤔

Getting several views per week from Turkey

Over the past month or more I’ve been seeing an increase in views from #turkey 🇹🇷. Same person? Big #e30 fanbase there? #spambots? Let me know what you think! #e30life #turkishdelight

E30’s Rarest Part!

E30’s RAREST Part!

I’ve always admired conceptual designers like Tobias Wong, Matty Benedetto, and Katerina Kamprani for their ability to come up with Industrial Designs which aren’t necessarily useful. In fact, sometimes these ideas are absurdly, and intentionally not useful.

Anyone who has known me for any amount of time knows I’m a bit of a jokester, but for some reason I’ve never been great at coming up with ideas for silly product designs. I suppose I’m just an all-function guy. But last summer it finally happened. I had that silly idea!

Just in case you’re not familiar – “blinker fluid” is an old car gag of mysterious origins, whereby a car enthusiast prankster would attempt to convince an automotive novice that s/he needs blinker fluid. The prompt is generally when one of the turn signal bulbs in the car of the soon-to-be-pranked burned out, or when it’s time for routine maintenance such as an oil change or filling up the washer fluid.

The joke eventually settled into the fabric of the internet from car forums to social media replies. I always thought the gag was missing a crucial element; Where does the blinker fluid actually go? YouTuber ChrisFix went viral a few years ago with a very clever 4/1 video where he demoed adding the blinker fluid directly in to the blinker bulb housing. While it was a well edited piece, I felt it a bit of a conceptual stretch.

So when I had the idea last summer I knew I had to do it. Yes, the blinker fluid gag is a little overplayed at this point. However, as a hardware guy, I figured I could bring a new twist to an old car joke. First, different manufacturers have different ways of engineering things. So it’s easily conceivable that BMW would have a fluid tank where Ford might add it directly to the unit. Second, With the E30 having that extra space in the engine bay it was a great spot for the tank, and lends an air of “credibility” to the story. And finally, since I don’t naturally come up with ideas like these very often, it was literally a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to do something fun & silly – so I couldn’t resist!

Hope you enjoyed this bit! If you have an old BMW – or any car really – that you can’t get parts for anymore, please reach out and maybe we can get you that impossible-to-find part. And heck, if you like what we’re doing and you want to support our startup, but we don’t have a part you need yet, we’ll print you a blinker fluid reservoir!

Klaus Luthe’s 91st Birthday

You might be shocked to find this out, but I have a serious thing for cars. To the point that might be an understatement. And slight character flaw. In middle school and high school I dreamt of becoming a great car designer, constantly doodling cars instead of doing my math homework. Although being the pre-internet days, I didn’t really know who any of the designers were other than the father/son Porsche legacy. The generic car books generally didn’t attribute the designers other than the passing mention of Bertone or Pininfarina.

My first car was handed down to me by my pop when I was 17. A 1974 Karmann Ghia droptop in Saturn Yellow. In the mid 90s it was a bit of a joke to my friends, but I loved it. I had grown up in the back seats of aircooled VWs mostly, so it was a familiar mode of transportation to me. And I thought it was cool, which is said, is all that matters. But I can’t say I knew who the designer was other than it was someone employed by the Italian design studio Ghia.

But that’s the way it is in most industries in fact. Heck, I’ve designed several things that are in tens of thousands of peoples homes and nobody knows who I am!

But an elite few designers rise to the very top of the industrial design field.

When one thinks of BMW, sure, many might quickly gravitate to some of the latest offerings, namely, their technically impressive ///M cars and SUVs. Others might celebrate or lament the E60-86 creations from the peak of the Bengal era. However, it’s impossible to understate the significance and timelessness of the automobiles produced in the 1980-1999 era of BMWs under the design direction of Klaus Johannes Luthe.

Born on December eighth, nineteen thirty two, Mr Luthe would have been 91 today. I won’t rehash his career (or tragic personal life) here, as many bloggers have already done fine jobs of that. But suffice to say, he worked his way to the top starting with busses, contributed to the design of the original Fiat 500, and surely at least commented on the development of the E36/7-8 and E46. Pretty cool.

This is after all, e30update.com, so I want to focus on the masterwork itself. What makes it so great?

First I want to get a pet peeve off my chest. I absolutely loath automotive styling cliches. Trends are one thing, and BMW – until recently – hired designers who were masters of translating design and styling trends into sophisticated transportation packages that reflected a focused design and engineering philosophy.

Cliches on the other hand, are the recycled, and rehashed, stolen, overused, and stolen again styling details that are obvious ripoffs of styling details from competing manufacturers. And it’s almost always totally cringe. Think tail fins in the 50s. Although some of those were pretty rad (I’m looking at you 1959 Chevy Impala)!

I get it. you’ve gotta stay relevant. You’ve gotta keep up with the times. Sure. And everyone’s guilty of it. Heck, my Ghia has tail fins. And not even very good ones by the time ’74 hit. Speaking of which, that reminds me of another cliche pet peeve: ginormous tail lights. Happened to the Ghia. Even happened to the E30.

Sometimes it’s regulations I’m sure, but did the original Lincoln Navigator really need tail lights that big? I mean, they literally looked like translucent toboggans. Totally horrendous. But I digress; I’ll do a separate styling cliche blog post some day because those only scratch the surface of my list.

Luthe was certainly fortunate to have inherited an in-place styling platform with a refined set of cleverly thought-through and developed cues. I’m obviously referring to things like the kidney grilles, Hofmeister kink (which yes, was a styling cliche…), sharp, full-length body crease, quad-round headlights, and long (but not too long) hoods. However, one need only take a look at todays raft of BMW offerings to see how this seemingly straightforward set of guidelines can be grotesquely implemented.

But grotesque wasn’t Luthe’s thing. He was of course an old-school German designer, no doubt influenced by the Bauhaus school of design, Dieter Rams and the Northern European “less is more” philosophy of design. In fact Luthe coined his own phrase for his distain of over-baked styling cliches calling them “optical environmental pollution”. Which I’m sure sounds awesome when spoken in German.

Although styling cues such as horizontal creases, four round headlights, forward-slicing window lines, or even two vertically mirrored grill openings weren’t exclusive to BMW, it was the combination of those stylistic elements and the consistency across models that made BMW styling so distinctive, then and now.

The other, and arguably more important factor of automobile design is proportion. Don’t believe me? Look at the difference between the VW Rabbit and Ford Gremlin. Sure, that’s an extreme comparison, but it can also be seen in the transition from the E21 to the E30. Not to say that the E21 is an irreparably hideous catastrophe of car design, but there is a special proportional balance in the E30 that simply doesn’t exist in the models that came before it. Or perhaps after.

And that takes incredible skill and talent.

To this day the E30 is still one of the first models that comes to mind when the letters BMW are mentioned. Yes, the Neue Klasse models like the 2002s brought BMW roaring into the second half of the 20th Century. But even those are pretty obscure today. The incredibly popular E39 5series is perhaps what most might visualize, but to be fair could almost be mistaken for an E36, if not an E30.

The BMW 3 series manufactured from 1982-1992 lives in this magical realm between the minimalist restraint of the mid 20th century, while simultaneously revving up for the 21st. In my opinion it really wasn’t until the 2010s that the E30 even looked that dated. Which interestingly is right about the time the values started to climb. And not all cars values start automatically moving skyward after 40 years. That reward is saved for the ones that are well engineered, well built, and of course, well designed.

So here’s to Klaus on his birthday; the incredible talent behind “God’s Chariot”. Hopefully some day not too soon, I’ll get to hear him say “optical environmental pollution”.