Don’t Stance UR e30! (Do This Instead)!

It’s time to mow the grass, have you stanced your mower?

Don’t Stance UR e30!

(Do This Instead)!

Anyone who knows me knows I’m not a stance guy – when it comes to my cars. But my mowers? That’s a different story! We don’t have any parts related to slamming your E30, but we do have a bunch of parts that can make your replica of God’s Chariot look great in other ways!

E30 cow catcher brackets for “diving board tuck” 3part kit Install

Can you spot the difference?
E30 cow catcher brackets for tucked diving board 3part kit Install

After doing the “diving board tuck” mod myself a few years ago, I just accepted the increased gap between the diving board and cow catcher as an inevitable tradeoff. It wasn’t until someone pointed it out to me At The Vintage, that I realized it was a bit more of an eyesore than I had let myself believe. Then, in the middle of an oil pan job, it hit me. Why not redesign the brackets to eliminate the extra space? So that’s what I did!

The cow catcher brackets for “diving board tuck” 3part kit is for a popular DIY cosmetic modification. This infamous E30 modification releases the gas from the impact shocks that support the bumper. Once all the gas (or goo) is expelled from the cylinders, they are compressed and reinstalled. The result is that it “tucks” the front (and rear) US Spec bumpers of the Series1 E30s for a more modern profile. Unfortunately, it comes with the minor, but noticeable side effect of increasing the gap between the aluminum bumper and the cow catcher mounted below. Why does this happen? It occurs because both the cow catcher and the aluminum bumper have significant draft angles for easy mold release. When the metal beams are pushed towards the cabin, the narrower side is closer to the narrower side of the cow catcher. Thus increasing the space between them.

The good news is that E30 Update has the solution!

We now offer the E30 cow catcher brackets for diving board tuck 3part kit which includes the centerleft, and right brackets. Designed specifically for those of us who have tucked our diving boards, now you will have the tightest diving board bumper tuck at the next cars & coffee! That is, until you tell all your friends about this kit, and they install them too. But then we’ll be really happy. And you and all your friends will be happy! And everything will be great!

This kit does not include the corner, and side-support brackets. If you already have your corner and side support brackets, they are not necessary for installing these tuck-mod brackets. They don’t have re-engineered geometry.

If there is demand, we will add the full seven-part kit. Let us know!

*For off-road use only. This product has not been approved for road use by any Federal or State Agency.

Missing Cow Catcher

#e30 has a little different presence without the #cowcatcher in tact. Off to get some #hardware for an upcoming video. Bet you can’t guess what it’s about :))

E30s in Turkey?

Growing fan base in Turkey?! 🤨🤗🤔

Getting several views per week from Turkey

Over the past month or more I’ve been seeing an increase in views from #turkey 🇹🇷. Same person? Big #e30 fanbase there? #spambots? Let me know what you think! #e30life #turkishdelight

E30’s Rarest Part!

E30’s RAREST Part!

I’ve always admired conceptual designers like Tobias WongMatty Benedetto, and Katerina Kamprani for their ability to come up with Industrial Designs which aren’t necessarily useful. In fact, sometimes these ideas are absurdly, and intentionally not useful. 

Anyone who has known me for any amount of time knows I’m a bit of a jokester, but for some reason I’ve never been great at coming up with ideas for silly product designs. I suppose I’m just an all-function guy. But last summer it finally happened. I had that silly idea! 

Just in case you’re not familiar – “blinker fluid” is an old car gag of mysterious origins, whereby a car enthusiast prankster would attempt to convince an automotive novice that s/he needs blinker fluid. The prompt is generally when one of the turn signal bulbs in the car of the soon-to-be-pranked burned out, or when it’s time for routine maintenance such as an oil change or filling up the washer fluid.

The joke eventually settled into the fabric of the internet from car forums to social media replies. I always thought the gag was missing a crucial element; Where does the blinker fluid actually go? YouTuber ChrisFix went viral a few years ago with a very clever 4/1 video where he demoed adding the blinker fluid directly in to the blinker bulb housing. While it was a well edited piece, I felt it a bit of a conceptual stretch. 

So when I had the idea last summer I knew I had to do it. Yes, the blinker fluid gag is a little overplayed at this point. However, as a hardware guy, I figured I could bring a new twist to an old car joke. First, different manufacturers have different ways of engineering things. So it’s easily conceivable that BMW would have a fluid tank where Ford might add it directly to the unit. Second, With the E30 having that extra space in the engine bay it was a great spot for the tank, and lends an air of “credibility” to the story. And finally, since I don’t naturally come up with ideas like these very often, it was literally a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to do something fun & silly – so I couldn’t resist!

Hope you enjoyed this bit! If you have an old BMW – or any car really – that you can’t get parts for anymore, please reach out and maybe we can get you that impossible-to-find part. And heck, if you like what we’re doing and you want to support our startup, but we don’t have a part you need yet, we’ll print you a blinker fluid reservoir

E46 power window lever

E46 power window lever

We love the E30! At least enough to name our startup after it. But we understand that not everyone is fortunate enough to drive God’s Chariot! And that’s OK! Because there are a few other great BMWs rollin’ around, like, the E46.

One thing is for sure, the power window buttons in the E30 are virtually indestructible. The E36’s buttons looked similar, but were actually rocker action switches which were fairly reliable if not quite as durable as the E30’s dead-simple, press-button hardware.

However for the E46 power window lever, BMW went full-on “planned obsolescence” with this three-mechanical-level, dual-action design. They’re just an absolute masterpiece of crap engineering! The design itself is actually somewhat sophisticated in a minimalist way, and admittedly they’re quite enjoyable to use. However these things are simply complete junk, and always breaking off!

They’re made of barely over 1mm thin translucent white plastic, which becomes very brittle after 15-20 years. They can still be purchased “new”, but it’s not like they just popped out of the mold; they’ve been sitting on a warehouse shelf somewhere for a decade or two… getting crispy. And of course you have to buy the whole assembly. Or you can get them used…. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

So we decided to fix that. We reverse-engineered the E46 power window lever, and added some extra material for strength – where we could (there’s just not a lot of room to play with in there). And to install, they simply snap in!

Going places!

While the E30 will always be our true love, the E46 is a pretty great car too! We have a couple more things coming for the Gen4 3er… and maybe even the E36! So get on the email list, or “like & subscribe” to know when we get the latest part up.  

If your E46 power window levers are starting to break loose – or are completely gone, get the E30 Update E46 power window levers. It’s much better than getting used parts, and they’ve been re-engineered for extra strength. Made with new, durable PETG plastic so they haven’t been dry-rotting for 20 years, and you don’t have to buy and install a whole new switch assembly.

Klaus Luthe’s 91st Birthday

You might be shocked to find this out, but I have a serious thing for cars. To the point that might be an understatement. And slight character flaw. In middle school and high school I dreamt of becoming a great car designer, constantly doodling cars instead of doing my math homework. Although being the pre-internet days, I didn’t really know who any of the designers were other than the father/son Porsche legacy. The generic car books generally didn’t attribute the designers other than the passing mention of Bertone or Pininfarina. 

My first car was handed down to me by my pop when I was 17. A 1974 Karmann Ghia droptop in Saturn Yellow. In the mid 90s it was a bit of a joke to my friends, but I loved it. I had grown up in the back seats of aircooled VWs mostly, so it was a familiar mode of transportation to me. And I thought it was cool, which is said, is all that matters. But I can’t say I knew who the designer was other than it was someone employed by the Italian design studio Ghia. 

But that’s the way it is in most industries in fact. Heck, I’ve designed several things that are in tens of thousands of peoples homes and nobody knows who I am! 

But an elite few designers rise to the very top of the industrial design field. 

When one thinks of BMW, sure, many might quickly gravitate to some of the latest offerings, namely, their technically impressive ///M cars and SUVs. Others might celebrate or lament the E60-86 creations from the peak of the Bengal era. However, it’s impossible to understate the significance and timelessness of the automobiles produced in the 1980-1999 era of BMWs under the design direction of Klaus Johannes Luthe. 

Born on December eighth, nineteen thirty two, Mr Luthe would have been 91 today. I won’t rehash his career (or tragic personal life) here, as many bloggers have already done fine jobs of that. But suffice to say, he worked his way to the top starting with busses, contributed to the design of the original Fiat 500, and surely at least commented on the development of the E36/7-8 and E46. Pretty cool.

This is after all, e30update.com, so I want to focus on the masterwork itself. What makes it so great?

First I want to get a pet peeve off my chest. I absolutely loath automotive styling cliches. Trends are one thing, and BMW – until recently – hired designers who were masters of translating design and styling trends into sophisticated transportation packages that reflected a focused design and engineering philosophy. 

Cliches on the other hand, are the recycled, and rehashed, stolen, overused, and stolen again styling details that are obvious ripoffs of styling details from competing manufacturers. And it’s almost always totally cringe. Think tail fins in the 50s. Although some of those were pretty rad (I’m looking at you 1959 Chevy Impala)! 

I get it. you’ve gotta stay relevant. You’ve gotta keep up with the times. Sure. And everyone’s guilty of it. Heck, my Ghia has tail fins. And not even very good ones by the time ’74 hit. Speaking of which, that reminds me of another cliche pet peeve: ginormous tail lights. Happened to the Ghia. Even happened to the E30. 

Sometimes it’s regulations I’m sure, but did the original Lincoln Navigator really need tail lights that big? I mean, they literally looked like translucent toboggans. Totally horrendous. But I digress; I’ll do a separate styling cliche blog post some day because those only scratch the surface of my list. 

Luthe was certainly fortunate to have inherited an in-place styling platform with a refined set of cleverly thought-through and developed cues. I’m obviously referring to things like the kidney grilles, Hofmeister kink (which yes, was a styling cliche…), sharp, full-length body crease, quad-round headlights, and long (but not too long) hoods. However, one need only take a look at todays raft of BMW offerings to see how this seemingly straightforward set of guidelines can be grotesquely implemented. 

But grotesque wasn’t Luthe’s thing. He was of course an old-school German designer, no doubt influenced by the Bauhaus school of design, Dieter Rams and the Northern European “less is more” philosophy of design. In fact Luthe coined his own phrase for his distain of over-baked styling cliches calling them “optical environmental pollution”. Which I’m sure sounds awesome when spoken in German. 

Although styling cues such as horizontal creases, four round headlights, forward-slicing window lines, or even two vertically mirrored grill openings weren’t exclusive to BMW, it was the combination of those stylistic elements and the consistency across models that made BMW styling so distinctive, then and now. 

The other, and arguably more important factor of automobile design is proportion. Don’t believe me? Look at the difference between the VW Rabbit and Ford Gremlin. Sure, that’s an extreme comparison, but it can also be seen in the transition from the E21 to the E30. Not to say that the E21 is an irreparably hideous catastrophe of car design, but there is a special proportional balance in the E30 that simply doesn’t exist in the models that came before it. Or perhaps after. 

And that takes incredible skill and talent. 

To this day the E30 is still one of the first models that comes to mind when the letters BMW are mentioned. Yes, the Neue Klasse models like the 2002s brought BMW roaring into the second half of the 20th Century. But even those are pretty obscure today. The incredibly popular E39 5series is perhaps what most might visualize, but to be fair could almost be mistaken for an E36, if not an E30. 

The BMW 3 series manufactured from 1982-1992 lives in this magical realm between the minimalist restraint of the mid 20th century, while simultaneously revving up for the 21st. In my opinion it really wasn’t until the 2010s that the E30 even looked that dated. Which interestingly is right about the time the values started to climb. And not all cars values start automatically moving skyward after 40 years. That reward is saved for the ones that are well engineered, well built, and of course, well designed.

So here’s to Klaus on his birthday; the incredible talent behind “God’s Chariot”. Hopefully some day not too soon, I’ll get to hear him say “optical environmental pollution”. 

E30 Update Black Friday 2023

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! It’s time for the E30 Update Black Friday 2023 sale! Remember – E30 Update has ten parts up now and over 100 more in the pipeline! Because we’re so dankbar 4 U, we’re offering 50% off site wide like all the other cool kids!

Cow Catcher Brackets – Diving Board Tuck – Normally $46.00

These bumper tuck Cow Catcher brackets are designed specifically for those of us who have tucked the front “Diving Board” bumper. They lift the “Cow Catcher” up 15mm to tighten the gap between the top of the Cow Catcher air dam and the aluminum bumper.

Cow Catcher Brackets Normally – $44.00

Center “Cow Catcher” Bracket printed in FFF PETG, .2mm layer height, 75% gyroid infill.

Cow Catcher Corner Brackets – Normally $18.47

E30 “Cow Catcher” corner support bracket keeps the corners of your cow catcher nice and tight.

Cow Catcher Side Support Bracket – Normally $23.00

Because these brackets are NLA and hard to find used in usable condition, often times people resort to popping in sheet metal screws, using zip-ties, rivets, or other makeshift solutions. In addition to the front support brackets and corner support brackets, E30 Update has re-created a stock-like solution for this annoying #E30problem!

Fuse Puller – Normally $16.00

If your fuse box is missing this finger-saving little accessory, here’s a cool little replica. Only from E30 Update.

Cigarette Lighter Retainer Clip – Normally $24.00

If you prefer a stock console setup in your E30, this cigarette lighter retainer clip from E30 Update is a must. It provides a firm, like-new DC outlet experience for plugging in a USB dock, or even a cigarette lighter!

Diving Board Bumper Strip – MJF Normally $189.00

As with all parts, they can also simply go missing. Owners then have to zip-tie their plates on, or tie them up with wire. Some people want to mount a Euro style plate, still others just want a clean-looking Diving Board™. This product solves all those problems! If you haven’t already, go check out the blog post https://e30update.com/updates/love-4-the-diving-board. We also have an install video over on the YouTube.

GLOVE BOX “DRIVE” LATCH – Normally $48.66

While the original glove box drive latch is metal, it can still break, (we know first hand!). When it does, it can very annoyingly leave you locked out of your glove box. If you have important info like your registration and proof of insurance in there, it can become an even bigger problem :/

GLOVE BOX “DRIVEN” LATCH – Normally $48.66

The glove box “driven” latch rarely breaks, but like the drive latch, it is made of the same brittle pot metal. If it does, you can now replace just the latch, without having to get the entire assembly. It also saves the time of having to switch out your tumbler or having to replace the entire assembly and then having to have a separate glove box key.

GLOVE BOX LATCH HOUSING – FFF – Normally $28.48

If, like most E30 glove box latch housings, yours is cracking and crumbling with age, you can now replace it with a new, 3D printed part.

Thanks for looking at the E30 Update Black Friday 2023 sale!

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